Knowing When To Contact Your Ex Boyfriend
Getting back together requires communication. While breaking contact is an important part of making your ex miss you, knowing exactly when to contact your ex boyfriend is a critical, vital part of the reconciliation process.
When a breakup occurs, it's usually very abrupt. You and your boyfriend go from talking every single day to having no contact at all. You're not supposed to call, text-message, email, or even look in your exboyfriend's direction. The whole process is very unnatural, for two people who seemingly loved each other.
For this reason, many women feel the need to reach out to their ex boyfriends immediately. It's very hard to forget about someone you spent so much of your time with, and who you had such a deep connection to. When your ex breaks things off, you may feel entitled to still talk to him. You might also feel like you want answers: as if the reasons he gave you for ending the relationship weren't good enough. In cases like this, you might press or push your ex boyfriend for more communication than he's willing to give, causing resentment.
Right after he breaks up with you is not the best time to contact your ex boyfriend. If your relationship ended in a bad argument or a lot of fighting, the two of you both need some time to cool off. And even if this isn't the case? Letting go of someone for a while is a really great way to see how much you really need and miss them. This holds true of your boyfriend as well... even though he might not be showing it, your ex is going through the same type of emotional withdrawals you are.
Calling, emailing, texting... staying in your boyfriend's face throughout the breakup? Acting this way is always a bad move. Many women ask the same question: how long should I wait before calling my ex boyfriend? The answer of course varies, but if you're literally dying to get back in touch with him chances are that you're not yet ready. If you're too needy or desperate, any contact you make with him right now will start off on the wrong foot. Having no communication with your ex boyfriend is always better than negative contact.
Some of the initial vibes you need to put off after a guy breaks up with you are as follows:
- Walking away from the breakup with minimal fighting or arguing
- Not trying to hang on or fix the relationship by asking for "one more chance"
- Acting unphased or almost uncaring about the fact that he ended things
- Not accepting any initial contact from your ex boyfriend (including calls, emails, or texts)
- Unplugging for a while (i.e. No MySpace, Facebook, or social networking activity)
When you're able to adapt a response similar to what's listed above, you're sending your ex the message that you won't be chasing him. The residual contact and communication that he expects from you is actually kind of comforting to him: it shows that you need him, and most of all it tells him that he can get you back whenever he wants. By eliminating such contact, you can quickly make your ex boyfriend very confused about what's going on. He gets a good taste of being alone, and he starts to see what his life is going to be like without you around anymore.
These are the things that will reverse your break up. Once your ex boyfriend begins wondering where you are and what you're doing, he'll start looking to reach out to you. Your ex might call you, or ask friends about you, and try to find out what in your life has changed. This is when he's receptive to communicating with you, and this is when to contact your ex boyfriend.
Getting Your Ex Boyfriend To Respond To You Again
So now what? How do you re-open the lines of communication with your exboyfriend, and what should you tell him?
Knowing the right (and wrong) things to say to your ex is a crucial part of getting him back. You can't put the pieces of your broken relationship back together until you've fully realized what your ex wants. Understanding why you broke up, and more importantly why your ex broke up with you, is vital. This is why it's necessary to have a plan of attack, and a step-by-step blueprint for how you'll handle any future exboyfriend contact.
One of the most innovative approaches to getting an exboyfriend back is the instantly-downloadable guidebook: Get Him Back Forever.
Relationship guru Matt Huston gives you a frank, candid, no-bullshit approach to winning your relationship back from a guy who dumped you. His guide is an in-depth glimpse into exactly what your ex is feeling, and what's going on in his head immediately after he breaks up with you.
Learn what mistakes you may already be making, as well as how to correct them. Also find out how to spot the signs and signals that your ex still loves you - even when you have no contact and haven't seen him since he broke up with you.
Listen to Matt's Free First Moves audio, and see what he has to say about why your boyfriend seems cold and distant right now. Learn how to turn him around, get him to see you as he once did, and make him feel those old, familiar feelings that caused the two of you to fall in love in the first place.
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